I cannot even recollect the amount of times I have been told I am so
creative. I believe having bipolar allows me to feel deeper, lover harder, run
faster, and see details that those without mental illnesses do not sense or experience.
Personally, the best poetry I produce is when I am in a mixed state,
with manic energy, in conjunction with a down phase, where for me it usually
feels like a cold, dark, and depressing depth of despair.
There are also times in my life where I am so manic, I hear color, and
I see sound. The flight of ideas, sped up thoughts, heightened senses, such as
visual, auditory, or other stimuli is beyond words. There is a medical term for
this called hyperacuity, which means sharpness of perception.
For me personally, communicating through poetry when I am feeling sad
and alone helps me to spew out my depressive thoughts, with manic urgency. My
brain is usually five steps ahead of my hand on the pen. I feel such powerful emotions;
I find it hard to not let them out in some outlet or way, be it poetry or some
other form of art.
Why is it that individuals with mental illnesses, such as bipolar disorder,
lean towards careers in the arts? It has
been suggested that mental illness and creativity often go hand in hand. So
many themes in poetry are about loss, despair, sadness, and depression.
For instance, Sylvia Plath was a beautiful poet who ended her life by
suicide. In 2001, a psychologist by the
name of James C. Kaufman created the term the Sylvia Plath to refer to the phenomenon that poets are more
susceptible to mental illness than other creative writers are.
Some folks with bipolar disorder worry that they will lose energy and
creativity if they agree to take medication for their illness. Personally, I have
noticed that my medication does control my mania and depression, thus only
allowing spurts here and there to permit me the ability to write poetry.
Whether it is drawing pictures, making jewelry, writing poetry, or writing
my autobiography, I always feel creative energy within my soul. For those with
mood disorders out there, can you relate?
Bipolar Betty
5 comments:
I can definitely relate. I have synesthesia (seeing color when hearing music...or seeing color with every letter/word). And I once was on an ADD medication that made me completely lose my colors and ability to write/compose music. It was NOT a good thing. My depression also affects my synesthesia, unfortunately.
I like this posts. After my manic episodes I become very much creative. My family points out that I've become more creative in starting my blog and writing daily. Interesting. Thank you for having the courage to share your story with the world.
Thanks for your comments gals. Keep commenting. Really trying to get more interaction from folks viewing my blog! Abigail...so true, I started the blog on a manic phase, which im still in. I'm hoping when I come down I still have the motivation to continue. I think the more folks I see commented and reading will help me continue.
I view the world through an artistic slant. I see art as a way to communicate. So your post is right on, your blog, I should say, is right on. Keep up the good work.
It's great for me when I'm manic, it helps me write this blog!! :)
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